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Archive: The Rockstar Ramblings Columns

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The Rockstar Ramblings: Girls, Kicking, and Cash

New videos featuring roundhouse kicks, girls, gambling, and of course, rock and roll. More...

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The Rockstar Ramblings: European Invasion

This week, a look across the pond at some new videos released by ’77, Hard Riot, and Europe More...

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The Rockstar Ramblings: The Tour

This week Kiss (Paul Stanley, Gene Simmons, Tommy Thayer, Eric Singer) and Motley Crue (Vince Neil, Nikki Sixx, Mick Mars, Tommy Lee) announced a summer blockbuster tour that will include both bands. A press conference was held in Los Angeles to announce the event and details. More...

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The Rockstar Ramblings: Sister Act

This week a look at two new videos: A classic head to head video showdown between Sister and Electric Sister. As always the rules are made up as we go along, except of course dancers and pole usage: both matter and both score well! More...

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The Rockstar Ramblings: BBQ, Needles, and Vans

Fresh off their “occupy Hard Rock” stint in Vegas, Motley Crue is back in the studio recording a new song. Vegas odds that the words “Hard Rock” are included are 2 to 1. Odds that Nikki Sixx and company will rhyme “cock” with “Hard Rock” is even money… More...

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The Rockstar Ramblings: Comedy. Sleaze. Horror.

It’s true, reality “star”, Dee Snider, is appearing in a sitcom. This week let’s take a look at the show promo for Snider’s new gig, a sleazy glam rock video from New York City rockers Electric Black Horse, and a frightening album teaser from Fatal Smile. More...

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The Rockstar Ramblings: Sold My Soul

Hailing from Melbourne, Australia, Laura Wilde has released a video titled “Sold My Soul.” Wilde, citing both punk and glam influences, sings, plays guitar, bass and drums. More...

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The Rockstar Ramblings: Mad Men

Last Sunday both Motley Crue and The Darkness were featured in Super Bowl ads. They aren’t the first from their genre to sell out, or allow the semi-truck full of cash back up into their driveway, nor will they be the last. Over the past few years a lot of rockers from the eighties have partnered with Madison Avenue to create brief whore-like relationships. This week a look at the new Super Bowl commercials, and a few blasts from the past commercials: More...

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The Rockstar Ramblings: Steel Panther Poster Ban

Last week the Advertising Standards Authority (ASA) banned a promotional poster used by the band Steel Panther. The poster featured a woman with her eyes closed with one hand on her crotch while two silver balls dangled between her legs. A group shot of the band is on the bottom of the poster. The ASA found this “overtly sexual” and “suggestive of an orgasm.” The band has released a statement explaining the 80s retro look and tongue-in-cheek message; however, the ASA ruling stands and use of the poster in public areas has been banned. More...

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The Rockstar Ramblings: The Friday Five

This week a look at five new videos; a mix of older and new bands, some videos good and some not so good. At least two, maybe three are exotic dancer friendly and one appears to pay tribute to Bon Jovi’s “Wanted Dead or Alive.” More...

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The Rockstar Ramblings: “Shake That Pussy”

Sometimes these things just fall into your lap. Uh, yes, pun intended. If you would have told me that Captain Zapped would release a song AND video for a song titled “Shake That Pussy” I would have told you to stop yanking my chain (again, yes) and then I would go directly to YouTube and check it out. Here’s my running diary… More...

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The Rockstar Ramblings: Van Halen Top 5 Videos

This week brought the first single and video from the new Van Halen album. Not only do we get David Lee Roth back, but also Eddie Van Halen’s son, Wolfgang, instead of Michael Anthony. There’s a lesson here kids. ANYWAY, the new video is “Tattoo” and the reviews have varied from “It’s good to hear Dave’s voice again” to “How many years did I have to wait for this shit!” Does the new video hold up to the vintage Van Halen videos? The old VH videos showcased a band with a sense of humor, keeping the balance between the song and having a good time. This week a look at some classic Van Halen videos before we dive into the new video… More...

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The Rockstar Ramblings: Jean Jackets and Fishnets

Happy New Year! Let’s kick it off with a couple of new bands paying homage to the glam metal of the eighties. First up is New York’s Nasty Habit. Their video “Saturday Night” is from their recently released EP. More...

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The Rockstar Ramblings: The Guns N’ Roses Top 25

The story that won’t go away, NOT Guns N’ Roses elected to the rock and roll hall of fame, but will they reunite to accept the honor? Despite recent reports, this is HIGHLY unlikely. Here’s one person’s list of the top 25 GNR songs to date. As in the past, note that although personal opinion was weighted heavily, I also took into account popularity, videos, etc… Since there were overall too many honorable mentions I won’t list them; however, I will say that from Chinese Democracy the songs Better, I.R.S., and Sorry were all close to cracking the top 25. More...

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The Rockstar Ramblings: Twas the night before…

The date: December 24, 1988
Location: Southern California

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the rock world
Not a guitar was sounding, not even a chord.
The bandanas were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that even more bandanas soon would be there.

The groupies were passed out, all snug in their beds,
With visions of DIO, dancing in their heads.
And Axl wearing his boxers, and Slash in his cap,
Had just settled their lawsuits, shot up, and decided to nap.

When out on the tour bus there arose such a clatter,
Bret Michaels sprang from his bed of whores to see what was the matter.
Away to the window he flew like a flash,
There he saw one of his whores, running away with his cash. More...

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The Rockstar Ramblings: Video Heaven, part II

This week we travel from Russia to Brazil and take a look at some new videos recently released. More...

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The Rockstar Ramblings: The Crue Top 25

News spread fast regarding Motley Crue becoming the first hard rock band to take up residency in Las Vegas. It was announced that starting in February the band will be playing nightly shows at the Hard Rock Hotel and Casino. In light of this semi-groundbreaking news a look (IMO) of the top 25 Crue songs to date. Note that although personal opinion was weighted heavily, I also took into account popularity, videos, etc… More...

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The Rockstar Ramblings: Nasty Reputation

This week a look at a new video from Canadian rockers, Reverse Grip. They have released a new video for “Nasty Reputation”, a track from their new four-song EP. Reverse Grip is a hard rock band formed by the three Broda brothers (Sean, Dru and Dylan) with a mission to bring back true rock n' roll. WARNING: The following video contains drinking and lots of cow bell. More...

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The Rockstar Ramblings: Talk Dirty To Me

Over the past few weeks the band Kid Rocker has filed lawsuit against the band Poison for allegedly stealing songs originally written by Kid Rocker (band was broke up and presented the songs to C.C. as members of the band Screamin’ Mimis). Video (at the bottom) has surfaced, showing the bands riff for what would later become an alleged Poison hit. My opinion: given this alleged theft occurred over 20 years ago I find the timing suspicious. No word yet as to why wait until now to bring the lawsuit. The songs include “Talk Dirty to Me”, “Fallen Angel”, and “I Won’t Forget You.” What a perfect time to celebrate the video for “Talk Dirty to Me”; a made for MTV spectacle that started it all for the glam conglomerate we would come to know as Poison. Full Disclaimer: I was twelve and a big fan of this video when it came out. Did it shape my life in any way? Still working through this twice a week in therapy. More...

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The Rockstar Ramblings: The Axl Rose Interview

Last Friday Axl Rose (Guns N’ Roses) sat down with the crew from VH1’s That Metal Show and discussed lawsuits, Chinese Democracy, and the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Of course there was not enough time to ask ALL the questions. After some dumpster diving behind Miami’s American Airlines arena we found the rest of the questions that never got asked. More...

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