Dillinger Escape Plan Posts Huge Update
Band Photo: The Dillinger Escape Plan (?)
THE DILLINGER ESCAPE PLAN have issued the following update:
"It's been a long time since the last update, too long, and we're sorry. Oh come on don't act pissy, we didn't forget about you. Excuuuuuuse us, we were just busy kicking ass.
First off, thanks to Japan, Australia, and New Zealand. Here's what we learned during that time:
- People in those places continue to be some of the most insane.
- AT THE GATES kills it even after 12 years of not playing at all.
- Any fear or creepiness created by having an actual pig's head onstage with you, dressing up like an evil hunchback, and pouring blood on a globe is immediately reversed when you realize that the globe is actually a brightly colored beachball of the earth (This means you, Mayhem. You go so far, why not go the extra fifty bucks to get a real globe? You have a pig's head on stage for Christ's sake! Hell you could probably get an old globe, with like the USSR instead of Russia, for like five bucks on Bay. Nobody'll know. Stop slacking!)
- Australia has become the most expensive place on the planet earth. Their money is worth the same as ours, except their minimum wage is like $400 dollars an hour, so everything is marked waaaay up. Nuggets and a burger at McDonalds in Sydney was like $14. Craaaazy.
- The guitar player Dom Deluise or whatever his name is with the little peen complex from that band Disturbia or whatever they're called thinks that we care about them. Old news, but still funny. Check it. 'My Ferrari is better than your Honda!!! Our stages come apart and travel with us and yours don't!!! We have thirty guitar techs and you have one!' Coooool self esteem barometer douchebag. Wait...what's that I hear? The sound of your band still sucking? Oh, right. Gotcha there, bud.
Enough silliness. We have serious business to get down to. Like a summer's worth of ass kicking! Here is our full summer schedule thus far:
Europe (Festivals, with off dates with Meshuggah and Between The Buried And Me)
June
13 - Download Festival, UK(Castle Donnington was a much cooler name, just saying) - Headlining some tent, get a schedule or a program or whatever, figure it out. We're playing at the same time as KISS, so just find the band that doesn't look like a Halloween party at a senior home, that'll be us
14 - Club Tochka - Moscow, Russia
15 - Orlandina Club - St Petersburg, Russia
16 - Nosturi - Helsinki, Finland
17 - Rohre - Stuttgart, Germany
18 - Colosaal - Aschaffenburg, Germany
20 - VK - Brussels, Belgium
21 - 013 - Tilburg, Netherlands
22 - Hellfest - Clisson, France
24 - Salzhaus - Winterthur, Switzerland
25 - Roxy - Prague, Czech Republic
26 - Progresja - Warsaw, Poland
27 - Club Vaudeville - Lindau, Germany
28 - Gods Of Metal - Bologna, Italy
30 - Palasport - Bolzano, Italy
July
3 - Sticky Fingers - Gothenburg, Sweden
4 - Quart Festival - Kristiansand, Norway
5 - Roskilde Festival - Roskilde, Denmark
July (North America - as part of Warped Tour)
9 - Lakewood Ampitheatre - Atlanta, Georgia
10 - Central Florida Fairgrounds - Orlando, Florida
11 - Vinoy Park - St Petersburg, Florida
12 - Bicentennial Park - Miami, Florida
13 - St Johns County Fairgrounds - Elkton, Florida
14 - Verizon Wireless Ampitheatre - Charlotte, North Carolina
15 - Verizon Wireless Ampitheatre - Virginia Beach, Virginia
July (with CAVALERA CONSPIRACY, THROWDOWN, and BURY YOUR DEAD. We WILL be playing basically a full set on this tour, and if you aren't excited about seeing us and watching Max and Igor Cavalera finally play SEPULRURA songs together again on the same night, you shouldn't be reading this. And if you're a little sprout who doesn't understand why you should care about the Cavalera brothers playing Sepultura songs you might wanna do some homework).
17 - Electric Factory - Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
18 - The Palladium - Worcester, Massachusetts
19 - Irving Plaza - New York, New York
20 - Irving Plaza - New York, New York
21 - Ram's Head Live - Baltimore, Maryland
22 - Clutch Cargo - Pontiac, Michigan
23 - Vic Theatre - Chicago, Illinois
24 - The Orbit Room - Grand Rapids, Michigan
25 - WakeStock - Toronto, Canada
26 - McMahon Stadium - Calgary, Canada
27 - Myth - St Paul, Minnesota
29 - Gothic Theatre - Englewood, Colorado
31 - The Fillmore - San Francisco, California
August
1 - House Of Blues - Las Vegas, Nevada
2 - House Of Blues - Anaheim, California (finally! real southern California Dillinger shows!)
3 - House Of Blues - San Diego, California
5 - House Of Blues - Hollywood, California
Thats all the dates for now. If anything new happens or changes, you'll hear about it.
The Black Bubblegum video is out, you can see it on our main page, on youtube, on tv at like threeve in the morning or whenever it plays. Check it out.
Internet only shirts. The first four designs, while we were very happy with them, took forever to get mailed out. This was due to a variety of things, but mainly just because we had never done it before and there were a couple issues we didn't foresee and then had to work around. We've got it all under control now, all of the designs so far (Fix Your Face, Horse Hunter, Particle, and Milk Lizard) have been mailed out or will be done mailing this week, we're still on the tail end of the Lizard shirts. After that we'll put up the new ones and they'll get out much faster, starting with Black Bubblegum and When Acting As A Wave. Thanks for your patience if you ordered and it took a long time.
And last but not least, the real gem of this blog. A little thing called "Win A Date With Asian Steve". Asian Steve is our guitar tech, and he did some editing work on Ire Works under the hawkeye of Steve Evetts. At some point on the upcoming tour, a lucky girl fan is gonna go out with Asian Steve, and we're gonna film it and put it up on here and you'll get into the show for free blah blah blah. Really the point though is to watch some sloth get shit trashed with Asian Steve and see how long she can tolerate him talking incessantly about whatever he talks about when he's drunk, computers and whores and who knows what. It's gonna be a mix of that show Blind Date and the MTV show where people get $100 if they can tolerate something inhumanly annoying for ten minutes. Except this time it'll be A.S. hammered drunk babbling for a lot longer than ten minutes. He's super cool, looks like a missing son of John Lennon and Yoko, and knows a lot about NIN, protools, and loves being an asshole to people. Sound like your cup of noodles? Then get in touch.
Speaking of being an asshole to people I wanna thank our tour manager Chris for the comedic gem called "Giving the finger to random old people". Although probably a surefire way to totally fuck your karma up if you believe in such a thing, its also unbelievably hilarious.
Also thanks to our sometimes/former/who knows if our schedules will ever meet again merch guy Angel for something known as 'the game', which is when someone has gotten food or a drink that they really really wanted, and they are carrying it, and you knock it out of their hand onto the floor and laugh at them. This also works with drugs, infants, and anything else that you feel is precious that you are carrying and really wouldn't want to see knocked out of your hands.
As you can see by the above, we go out of our way to surround ourselves with assholes.
There's a CGI prairie dog and a spaceship at the end of the new Indiana Jones. Why. Why. Why."
Love always,
The Dillinger Escape Plan
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22 Comments on "Dillinger Escape Plan Posts Huge Update"
2. writes:
Great job - DEP - idiots just ruined the Indiana Jones movie for everyone....
Good thing I already seen the movie...and the prairie dog made me laugh...it was funny!
You just have to see the scene. DEP are a bunch of drunk knuckleheads...like some over-grown frat boys..haha.
Member
5. writes:
The movie is not called The Last Crusade...it is called Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. I actually liked the movie - it was nostalgic...slam the movie all you want..but it brought back good memories. I grew up watching Harrison Ford. It was intended to be family fun..sorry it didn't have excessive gore, or a pointless story with a plot twist. I have liked all the IJ movies. DEP are media attenion whores, especially since IRE WORKS sucks major a$$. I am sure they lost money on that album, so they have to tour their collective a$$es off. Technical, my white Texas a$$. Meshuggah is technical...those mother fukkers from DEP are simply pointless , noisecore. Once again, that fukkin' groundhog or prairie dog was awesome.
6. writes:
"The movie is not called The Last Crusade...it is called Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull"
Ah, right over your Texas head.
Anyways, do you have any idea of how many awards that Ire Works has won and how high its ratings have been from critics? It's also one of the best selling albums that Relapse has ever put out. Now if you want to talk about technicality, Dillinger do have it, you just don't know sh** about music. Have you ever heard of jazz? 7th chords? Mixolidian scales?
7. writes:
I hate fukkin' jazz...so ,no, I don't believe I have heard much jazz. I am not a guitarist, big deal. I know about vocals..though. DEP continues to suck a$$, and guess what, you can't change my opinion of them. To me, they are just screamo metalcore...fuk that.
Former Contributor
Writer, Reviewer
9. writes:
DEP are hit and miss... love a lot of their stuff, hate some of it.
"I hate fukkin' jazz" - sucks to be you, hahah. Jazz inspired the guitar virtuosity and technical playing that lead to bands like DEP and Meshuggah. Led Zep drew HEAVILY on jazz influences. Not that Zeppelin were an important band or anything... :P
"There was a reason it was called The LAST Crusade" - I hear that, brother, it really, REALLY should've been the last. The new Indy was an hour and a half cringe-fest. WTF with the lead-lined fridge, man?! They're not even TRYING to come up with realistic storylines anymore...
Now Playing: The John Butler Trio - "Used To Get High"
Member
13. writes:
i listen to DEP and it reminds me of Fallout boy, except with actual skill and good sounding music, so it' s ok. i think it's just the vocals that make me connect the two...
Anyway, it's nice to see actual people with amusing opinions out there in the music scene. I thought Lamb of God and Gwar were the only ones out there with a sense of humor these days.
'the game', which is when someone has gotten food or a drink that they really really wanted, and they are carrying it, and you knock it out of their hand onto the floor and laugh at them. This also works with drugs, infants, and anything else that you feel is precious that you are carrying and really wouldn't want to see knocked out of your hands.
^I do that all the time!
Now Playing: Napalm Death- "Siege of Power"
14. writes:
To post 9 - it is called family entertainment...sorry it was not realistic enough for you. I know it wasn't SAW or HOSTEL. Do you honestly think that the storyline could have been real??? That is George Lucas for you, he wants you to escape to another place, remember what it was like to be a kid again. It was entertaining, and nostalgic...like I said once before. I thought it was fukkin' cool to have Ford reprise his role of Indiana Jones. Yep - too bad you can't watch a movie without criticizing every little scene. That prairie dog was cool. One last thing, pure JAZZ sucks....I happen to like jazz-infused metal or rock - i.e. Lep Zeppelin or Meshuggah...but if I had my choice - I prefer Blues or Jazz.
16. writes:
To post 6 - You got me...how many awards did Ire Works receive??? one??
Better yet - how many units did Ire Works sell - about 1,000 - 5,000.
That is not even GOLD certified...disturbed makes GOLD without even trying... It is clear that DEP is jealous of Distrubed's success..but who am I?
GOLD is 500,000 units..
PLATINUM is 1,000,000,000 units...
DEP IRE WORKS - lucky to sell 2,000 units-if that many.
Former Contributor
18. writes:
Christina Aguilera went quadruple-Platinum - wow she must be, what, 8 times more talented than Disturbed?
Who needs guitar? Hmmm, bout 99.9% of metal bands (the other .1% is Neoandertals).
"I hate fukkin' jazz...so ,no, I don't believe I have heard much jazz." - wow, so just judge a whole genre on a few samples then eh? I encourage you to listen to some Alan Holdsworth, one of the worlds greatest guitarists, revered by people like Joe Satriani, Eddie Van Halen and Steve Vai.
19. writes:
Hey post 13 - yeah it is amusing..but it is also something else....IMMATURITY.
So what, when you get more mature, then suddenly having a sense of humor is childish? Besides, when Metal stops having fun, it just becomes pompous. That's why bands like Dethklok and Cannibal Corpse exist; to add the ability to laugh at itself to the Metal scene. When I see Ozzy up on stage, and he sprays the crowd with a water hose, do I see an idiot making a fool of himself? No I see a man enjoying the f*** out of what he does. So chill out on degrading everything you don't like, try and enjoy a conversation on here for once, instead of turning it into a crap-slinging contest.
Now Playing: Dethklok- "Duncan Hills Coffee Jingle"
Writer, Reviewer
20. writes:
Record sales may be a measure of exposure and commercial success, but it has nothing - absolute zero! - to do with talent or ability. That is all I will say on that ridiculous argument.
Holdsworth is great. Miles Davis, obvious, but worth the mention. My personal favourites are Charlie Byrd and Mark Isham.
Post 14- family entertainment? Sure. I get it. I loved seeing Harrison Ford (one of my all-time favourite actors) in one of his most memorable roles. It was great! But my thing is, if you're going for escapism, man, you can't half do it. You gotta go the whole hog. Star Wars? Set in the future, on alien planets. Who the hell knows what could be possible and what wouldn't be? THAT'S escapism. But surviving an A-bomb blast in a lead-lined fridge on Earth during the Cold War era? That's just ridiculous. Not only is it common knowledge that that shouldn't be possible, it's common sense. The movie had a lot of great ideas if escapism is what you're after. It's just that those ideas didn't meld with the setting- they clashed, horribly. It was the wrong setting for an escapism movie, man. If Indy had been in the future, hell, maybe I'll believe that they started making fridges durable enough to survive an A-bomb blast. But during the Cold War? Please. That's just insulting. And inter-dimensional beings made of highly magnetic crystal? What'd the scriptwriters do while they were on strike, acid?? Again, wrong setting; in the future, hell, maybe. Who knows? But in the past - No.
It was a great movie with a VERY poorly conceptualised script. THAT is all I'm saying here. As for being overly critical, if nobody ever said "not good enough," how would we ever advance ourselves? We'd be sitting on our lazy-boys waiting for Legally Blonde 15 to come out, man. Excuse me for liking movies with substance. You know, like Jazz, for instance?
Now Playing: Hubert Laws - "Midnight at the Oasis"
Writer, Reviewer
Member
22. writes:
I agree, psythe, substance is great, but if Tx doesn't like jazz, he doesn't like it. I don't see what classic artists being inspired by it has to do with Tx enjoying straight jazz. Obviously said artists didn't enjoy every aspect of it or they wouldn't have felt compelled to alter it into something else! Perhaps he should respect it, and I think he does in his own vulgar way, but it doesn't mean he has to like it. And as far as DEP goes, which isn't very far, they're showing their own noisecore Rockstar colors.
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1. Whoracle writes:
They are my heroes, plain and simple.