Bret Michaels: Life As I Know It
Band Photo: Poison (?)
During a recovery period that includes several appearances, a return to the stage, and only one week after Michaels took home the reality show title of Celebrity Apprentice, VH1 gives us Bret Michaels new show: Life As I Know It. The show, originally started production in April and was halted shortly after due to Bret’s appendectomy, then followed by his near fatal brain hemorrhage. One show (Monday’s) was completed. Production will continue in June and the show will continue in the Fall of 2010.
In episode one we see Bret in a chair explaining that this reality show will be different than the others, displaying the life away from the rock and roll lifestyle, focusing on his on-again-off-again girlfriend Kristi, and their two daughters Raine and Jorja. The show begins with Bret taking a nap on a couch. Not exactly the initial bang of Rock of Love, but let’s see where this goes, it’s not like the whole show will be Michaels napping, right?
Bret wakes up and is in the kitchen with Jorja, making fart jokes while his other daughter, Raine, tells her mom that dad (Bret) is boring. Bret takes the girls to a place with trampolines; Kristi has a girl day with her friend Julia. Apparently girl day means “scripted conversations” because all we see is the two girls discussing whether or not Bret can commit to a long term relationship, the conversation is forced and does not feel real. I am starting to wonder if the whole show is purely scripted. If so, up to this point it would read: Bret sleeps. Fart jokes. More napping. The only thing interesting is Kristi admitting she goes through a lot of batteries when Bret is on the road.
Back at the house Raine is doing a report on her dad and needs to come up with “What was the worst day of your life?”. After coming up with a very long list that leaves Michaels squirming, Raine agrees to go with the Tony Awards head-shot. Given recent events, I’m guessing Michaels now has a new “What was the worst day of your life?”
Dinner is served and then Bret falls asleep on the couch.
After awaking from his slumber, Michaels gets a call and has to leave a day earlier than initially planned. His daughters are sad he has to go. With Michaels gone to do a show, his youngest daughter, Jorja, decides to put on a red bandana and pretend she is her dad, wishing he was there. The next day, unexpected, Michaels shows up, flying back on his one day off.
What did we learn from the first episode of Life As I Know It? Well, that Bret Michaels likes to nap on the couch, and his girlfriend goes through a lot of batteries. Most importantly we learn that not prayer, hope, nor logical thinking can make the unthinkable happen; instead, just put on a red bandana and make a wish, don’t underestimate the power of a bandana, at least not if your a child of Michaels…
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