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The Rockstar Ramblings: Hessler Reality TV

Chicago heavy metal band Hessler have released their new single and music video for "Last Alive". The band plans on taking the next two months to record their second album, the follow-up to 2011's 'Bad Blood', which will include "Last Alive." Hessler are Igz Kincaid (guitars), Frankie Sripada (guitars), Lariyah Daniels (vocals), Marcus Lee Cox (drums) and Erik Michael (bass).

Spoiler Alert: This video is an insanely good time!

We start with a crazy host pitching a pay-per-view execution for only 19.95. Is it just me or does that sound WAY too cheap for an execution? Also, the host is WAY too confident and should not be wearing the Hawaiian shirt with Zubaz pant combination. No one since John Belushi (granted it was sweatpants back then) and John Candy has been able to pull off the Hawaiian shirt and Zubaz look. It’s important to note that the host shoulder spinning the leathered up girls is preposterous. Have I mentioned what he is wearing?

Anyway, we have intertwining scenes, the first is a person being led though a jail of sorts; he is the next in line to be executed. A nun, played by Daniels is seducing a priest and our host is on stage taking calls from the audience (the callers will decide how to execute their contestant of the evening). So the nun air fucks (not close enough for a dry humping) the priest in order to get access to the guards (where she meets up with the rest of the band) and release the person to be executed. In other words, HESSLER SAVES THE DAY! To celebrate, the band takes over the stage and performs.

The programming change agrees with the viewers, just check out the phenomenal couch air guitar at 3:05. As for the fate of our mismatched host? Not good, at the end of the video he is still wearing Zubaz…

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David S. Grant (aka Rockstar_Scribbler) is the author of several books including Rock Stars, Happy Hour, and Corporate Porn. For more information please go to www.rockstarbooks.net or www.davidsgrant.com. You can also follow David on Twitter @david_S_grant.

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