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Triptykon's Tom G. Warrior Selling Wooden Jesus Dildo Sculpture

Photo of Celtic Frost

Band Photo: Celtic Frost (?)

Tom G. Warrior (Triptykon, ex-Celtic Frost) is currently selling two different wooden Jesus dildo sculptures online. Photos and details on the pieces can be found at this location. Tom G. Warrior posted the following descriptions of the two phallic statues:

"Phallus I/2011; metal Jesus mounted to wooden dildo cross; wood, white metal, steel, epoxy, and black enamel. This phallus sculpture is a unique, individual piece of which only one exists world-wide, hand-made by the artist. Cross created from 3 German hand-crafted, spruce wood dildos. Crucified messiah figurine and INRI insignia in metal. Dimensions: height approx. 20 cm (7.9"), width approx. 13.5 cm (5.5"), dildo diameter approx. 2.6 cm (1"). Weight: approx. 160 g (5.5 oz). Caution: for display purposes only!

Photobucket

"Phallus II/2011; resin Jesus mounted to wooden dildo; wood, resin, steel, epoxy, and enamel. This phallus sculpture is a unique, individual piece of which only one exists world-wide, hand-made by the artist. Dildo base created from a German hand-crafted, spruce wood dildo. Messiah figurine in resin, secured by steel pin. Dimensions: height approx. 23 cm (9"), dildo diameter approx. 2.6 cm (1"). Weight: approx. 100 g (3.6 oz)."

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13 Comments on "Tom G. Warrior Selling Wooden Jesus Dildos"

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Blindgreed1's avatar

Member

1. Blindgreed1 writes:

"Cross created from 3 German hand-crafted, spruce wood dildos."
LMFAO!!! Excellent find xFiruath!!!

# Jan 27, 2011 @ 5:37 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
Jackrum's avatar

Supporter

2. Jackrum writes:

I'll be honest.. I'd bid for them.. simply because the idea of f*****g over religion is appealing to me and plus Warrior is a legend

# Jan 27, 2011 @ 7:37 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
deathbringer's avatar

Founder, owner & programmer

3. deathbringer writes:

I like the "for display purposes only." Who buys dildos to put on display? :-P

# Jan 28, 2011 @ 6:54 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
silvermountains's avatar

Member

4. silvermountains writes:

Maybe I should buy one of these and shove one of them up Lars's @ss to show him my disrespect i have for him now that the big 4 is only one show....

# Jan 28, 2011 @ 9:52 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
Southern_Bastard's avatar

Member

5. Southern_Bastard writes:

All I have to say is WTF.

I like the second one: "sermon on the mount" right?

# Feb 15, 2011 @ 3:20 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
RTB's avatar

Member

6. RTB writes:

Im failing to see the dildo. .."look"
Looks like a piece of wood to me..

# Feb 15, 2011 @ 5:29 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
Blindgreed1's avatar

Member

7. Blindgreed1 writes:

"Looks like a peice of WOOD to me.." LMFAO. I don't even think your pun was intended. LMFAO!!!

# Feb 15, 2011 @ 5:37 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
RTB's avatar

Member

8. RTB writes:

I guess i walked into that one eh greed?
Story of my life

# Feb 15, 2011 @ 5:54 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
OlafBerzerker's avatar

Member

9. OlafBerzerker writes:

6,7 thats good stuff . Tom not so much

# Feb 15, 2011 @ 6:58 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
Diamond Oz's avatar

Senior News Correspondent

10. Diamond Oz writes:

I bet they aren't great quality. These salesmen always try to screw ya ;)

# Feb 15, 2011 @ 7:02 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
Demise's avatar

Member

11. Demise writes:

"height approx. 20 cm (7.9")"
It's probably more like 6 inches he just wants it to be 8 :)

# Feb 15, 2011 @ 7:46 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
Diamond Oz's avatar

Senior News Correspondent

12. Diamond Oz writes:

I heard he's gonna give them away with the next Triptykon album, that way if people don't like the record they can go f*** themselves.

# Feb 15, 2011 @ 8:05 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
RTB's avatar

Member

13. RTB writes:

Oz you limey..lmao!

# Feb 16, 2011 @ 3:02 AM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address

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