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Celebrity Apprentice: Bret Fires Back

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Band Photo: Poison (?)

This week’s episode starts off in Donald Trump’s apartment. The place is as you would expect, it’s like standing inside a solid gold jewelry box. Having the group at his place inspires The Donald to get crazy and switch up the teams, moving Bret to work with Holly and Cyndi Lauper on team Tenacity, which is a little strange because Bret came up with the team name Rock Solid, and won two challenges with the team he is now being asked to leave. Oh, the drama of reality television…

This week’s challenge is for the teams to refurbish a corporate apartment. The catch is that one room should be a “celebrity” room. For Rock Solid, it is Sharon’s chance to finally put herself on the line as she volunteers for the duties of Project Manager, on the team Tenacity side, Holly reluctantly accepts the role. Immediately Bret begins discussing his ideas, but is overshadowed by the chaos of the team make-up. They go from shag carpeting to Zen to disco balls in the kitchen all within five minutes. With Holly and Cyndi banging heads, Bret begins leading the team believing the celebrity room should have “An awesome celebrity feel!” Good job Bret, as always you are contributing. On the other side Sharon believes she is right for the job considering her and Ozzy have moved and lived in over twenty properties. When asked, Ozzy said he only recalled 2.5 properties. Okay, that didn’t happen.

Michaels decides that the apartment should have pictures of New York City so he begins snapping pictures of buildings and the skyline. In addition to the chaotic behavior, and a decision to use a lot of red paint, pizza boxes litter team Tenacity’s work area (is this all they eat on the show?). Bret has to leave the team for a gig, but is planning to stay up all night once he gets back to help the team.

When Bret returns he is greeted by Cyndi Lauper’s celebrity room which is bright red, no less red than the scene of Jules car in Pulp Fiction after Vincent Vega shoots the guy in the back seat. In addition to the possible blood red disaster, Bret’s photos are back and are way too small, and Cyndi Lauper wants to use table cloths as curtains. She is also accusing people of stealing furniture.

Predictably Bret and team Tenacity lose the challenge. Bret sits silently letting the girls (Holly and Cyndi) fight it out. There is one point where it looks like Bret gets a couple minutes of sleep. Looking for assistance, Donald asks suit guy to his left who should be fired and he says Bret because he missed time to go to a gig. This causes Bret to wake up and shoot a death stare at the suit, then argues with Trump that he did everything he could, stopping just short of dropping the first ever F-bombs in the boardroom.

Donald continues to needle Bret, asking him if he wants to be there and questioning his passion. However, in the end Trump fires Lauper, leaving Bret on the chopping block for the next episode should his team not win the next challenge. After the boardroom heat we see Bret standing over a bathroom sink wringing out the sweat from his bandana. Okay, that didn’t happen.

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David S. Grant (aka Rockstar_Scribbler) is the author of several books including Rock Stars, Happy Hour, and Corporate Porn. For more information please go to www.rockstarbooks.net or www.davidsgrant.com. You can also follow David on Twitter @david_S_grant.

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