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The Rockstar Ramblings: Kiss Steel Cage Challenge

Photo of Guns N Roses

Band Photo: Guns N Roses (?)

Forget Atkins, Low-Fat, or the South Beach diet: Try the new Sebastian Bach (Skid Row) Red Wine Only diet. Week six of Celebrity Fit Club displayed Bach easily beating ex-R&B star Bobby Brown in a long-distance running challenge up a hill. I guess I should point out Brown’s chronic chain smoking and potato chip addiction, but those are just details. Try the Red Wine Only diet today!...

Welcome to New Mexico, the home of Aerosmith scratch off lottery tickets. You can win be scratching away to reveal dollar values up to $50K as well as send in your losing tickets for a chance to win a trip to the Rock n’ Roll hall of fame. Rumor has it there is a third way to win that involves smoking the shavings, actually, this is the only way to ultimately win at this game…

Steven Adler (Adler’s Appetite, Guns N Roses) posted on his website offers of drum lessons and meetings. The lessons run $10K an hour and just under $8K for a meet and greet. Steven also offers to play a live show at your place for $50K. Well, $20K is to get the band to play, $30K is to get them to leave…

In an interview this week Slash (Guns N Roses, Velvet Revolver) defends Axl Rose’s behavior explaining that he sees things in a different way and that this trait makes him great and also difficult to deal with”. So which member of the original GNR line-up has been diagnosed bi-polar? In a recent twitter update from Axl he states (paraphrased): Just got shocked in the shower/Going to take a bunch of meds/Rant on “opportunists”/50 characters to call someone a “bottle throwing fuck”/Thank You/Peace. Oh yeah, now I remember…

This week’s Rock Star Moment comes from Scott Weiland (Stone Temple Pilots, Velvet Revolver) via an interview in Details magazine where he corroborated the story that he had a massage during the birth of his first child. His follow-up response: “Yes, I brought a masseuse into the delivery room, but I was right next to her, and was sober”…

Gene Simmons (Kiss) has challenged The Rolling Stones and U2 to a stage show challenge, to for once and for all see who puts on the most entertaining tour. I’m not sure what Gene is looking to get out of this, but maybe it is easiest to just make Simmons a championship belt he can wear. We don’t need this turning into a brittle bone steel cage match featuring Simmons/Stanley vs. Bono/The Edge, winner takes on Jagger/Richards. If this does happen, watch out for Keith Richards, you know he is known for his pile drivers…

Now for a new segment titled HEAD TO HEAD FIRST IMPRESSIONS. Today we look at Bret Michaels new single “Nothing to Lose” vs. Ratt’s new song (currently online) “Eat Me Up Alive”. Note that neither Miley Cyrus nor her father’s hair will be factored into the final decision. NTL starts off with the line “She looks in the mirror with the make up that don’t hide the pain”, EMUA begins with Stephen Pearcy screaming “Oh Yeah!” and then screeching something about laying a girl down to bed. Ratt is the winner. Thank you for playing HEAD TO HEAD FIRST IMPRESSIONS…

This week’s HUH? moment comes from W.A.S.P. whom cancelled a show in NYC last week because an extra $25 was charged for VIP tickets. When the promoters refused to refund the money, Blackie Lawless called off the show because he didn’t want to disappoint his fans…

Sharon Osbourne discussed Ozzy’s new book, I Am Ozzy, noting that there are offers to make the book into a movie. Always modest and shy, Sharon went on to say that an Oscar nominee should play her. What about Ozzy? A number of crazy names could be thrown in here (Ozzy himself, The guy from Blossom: Joey Lawrence, or Hugh Grant as the British lad), but for my money I’m only seeing the movie if John Stamos plays the role. That’s right; I’m pulling for Uncle Jessie playing Ozzy. Grow out the hair, nail that role, and he too will get an Oscar nominee…

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David S. Grant (aka Rockstar_Scribbler) is the author of several books including Rock Stars, Happy Hour, and Corporate Porn. For more information please go to www.rockstarbooks.net or www.davidsgrant.com. You can also follow David on Twitter @david_S_grant.

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2 Comments on "The Rockstar Ramblings: Kiss Steel Cage Challenge"

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1. Blindgreed1 writes:

LMFAO!!! Does Gene read MU? \m/\m/!!!

# Mar 19, 2010 @ 11:55 AM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
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2. samyiah writes:

you suck

# Mar 19, 2010 @ 7:53 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address

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