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Study: Bands With Long Names Have Shorter Life Spans

A study by the music department at the University of Maryland has revealed interesting findings. The study covered 1633 bands, primarily in rock and heavy metal, dating as far back as the late 70s.

Bands with three or more words in their name or 15 or more letters on average were found to last only 46.6% as long as bands with shorter names and 24.7% as long as bands with single word names.

"It seems to be a simple cause and effect relationship. Bands and especially their fans just don't want to put up with saying those ridiculously long names or coming up with abbreviations that are just as hard to pronounce. Over time, as fans tire and defect, the bands' motivation to continue wanes," Dr. Dubrow, a researcher, explained.

A recent example of long-winded disbanded bands that come to mind are Bodies in the Gears of the Apparatus, who were together only 4 years. Additionally, Through The Eyes of the Dead have trouble maintaining a stable lineup and it seems to be only a matter of time before their disband and their members all go on to join shorter-named bands.

In light of this study, some bands with long names have gotten recent attention and been put under the microscope. The Number Twelve Looks Like You have denied rumors of imminent breakup, in light of their recent lineup changes. Fear Before The March of Flames is said to be biding their time with wacky messages about playing their next album on five guitar harps, while they have secretly broken up.

The Tony Danza Tapdance Extravaganza has recenlty dropped off of a tour with From a Second Story Window and HeavyHeavyLowLow, and the band is rumored to be in the midst of a break up since the announcement that guitarist Brad Thomson was starting his own label.

One must be cautioned not to apply this theory to specific bands too literally.

Overall, the results would indicate that the current metalcore and hardcore fads will be short-lived, even moreso than the nu-metal fad where bands typically had one-word names and music just as simplistic. The typical metalcore name is easily recognizable, almost always containing three (or more) words. However, one must question the long term implications of this study - that as time goes on, there will be fewer short names to use, and bands with long names will have shorter lives, leading to a higher rate of band turnover and a logarithmic use of all possible band names.

It is noteworthy that all bands in the “black metal” sub genre were disqualified from this study because the occurrence of black metal bands killing band members or going to jail for long periods of time for heinous crimes skewed the results significantly or made them hard to measure.

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11 Comments on "Study: Bands w/ Long Names Have Shorter Life Spans"

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Bastard_Of_Bodom's avatar

Supporter

1. Bastard_Of_Bodom writes:

uhhhhhh I really dont know what to say

# Apr 1, 2007 @ 11:53 AM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
SexBloodandMetal's avatar

Member

2. SexBloodandMetal writes:

I've always noticed that statistic...not really news

# Apr 1, 2007 @ 12:05 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
StabbingTheDrama's avatar

Supporter

3. StabbingTheDrama writes:

I believe it. And to add to those bands what about ...And They Will Know Us By The Trail of the Dead. I think that's what it is, I don't know I don't like them and their name is too damn long to remember.

# Apr 1, 2007 @ 12:13 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
Anonymous Reader
4. Wrath5316 writes:

yea....

# Apr 1, 2007 @ 12:17 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
Anonymous Reader
5. cppchriscpp writes:

What's funny is it is kinda true... :P

I get the odd feeling that a big April Fools might be stamped on this one though.

Perhaps not though, when you think about it those with the shorter names nowadays do seem to last the longest. Meh I could go on pointlessly for lines and paragraphs but I won't.

# Apr 1, 2007 @ 12:29 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
Anonymous Reader
6. Gene writes:

There isn't any real metal news on Sunday morning so this site justs posts a bunch of stupid April Fool's Day fake news? There are already news sources like that. They're called Fox News and The Onion.

# Apr 1, 2007 @ 2:07 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
BoltThrower's avatar

Supporter

7. BoltThrower writes:

Umm, I think the few bands with short names slanted this survey: Metallica, ACDC, Iron Maiden, etc.

Against all the punk bands the draw three names ala Beavis and Butthead's Ensucklopedia.

# Apr 1, 2007 @ 4:35 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
BoltThrower's avatar

Supporter

8. BoltThrower writes:

I was thinking about some monolithic imperious doom names for my band with one or more "death of the" or "pain for the" with a possible "destruction of the" but maybe I should shorten it up a bit. How does "of deth" sound. It even fits on a license plate.

# Apr 1, 2007 @ 4:51 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
Plumb's avatar

Member

9. Plumb writes:

Hmmm...who the hell mad this up!But long names are uncalled for.Right Nailed kitty.Hey you smell.

# Apr 1, 2007 @ 5:18 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
RememberMetal?'s avatar

Writer/Reviewer

10. RememberMetal? writes:

...And you will know us by the trail of the dead

lol, I give them another 5 minutes...

# Apr 1, 2007 @ 11:20 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
hembrom's avatar

Member

11. hembrom writes:

Stupid crap , now what the f*** is relation between getting disbanded and weired long lame band name ??

STUPID f***ers.

# Apr 2, 2007 @ 3:22 AM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address

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