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Pit Stories: Invasion Of The Him-Hers

Photo of Rapheumets Well

Band Photo: Rapheumets Well (?)

Ready for yet another bout of Pit Story madness my fellow metal heads?

This week we've got a truly bizarre one that leaves the pit behind and focuses on band antics at the hotel room after the show, in which U.S. group Rapheumets Well gets some serious culture shock and a crash course in trans pride.

In typical metal fashion, things get taken perhaps a smidge too far. The symphonic extreme metal outfit's drummer Joshua Ward tells the tale like this:

So, members of Rapheumets Well were accompanying the band Behind The Veil to a show in the Ashville area of North Carolina. Now you got to picture that we are all very southern males with little to no exposure to the pride parades that Ashville is known for. It is to note, we are far from prejudice and we accept anyone for their sexual preferences being gay or straight, or what-ever percentage of gay to strait ratio can exist. You can make love to a duck for all we care. But you can say, we we just not ready for the “He-her” or the “Sheman,” Man in girl, whatever you can use to define the characters in our midnight saga.

So we are hanging off the balcony at a hotel and from the distance, our honkey eyes believe we are seeing women, flaunting about, twirling their batons, giggling and frolicking about, and for some reason that we have not discovered in our life’s journey yet…. other people on leashes. I’m sure it was our testosterone and possible lead poisoning from drinking from mountain spring water that lead us to the conclusion that these were women of mating age, doing things that seem appropriate for the other gender to want to mate …upon. Well the guitarist is yelling from the balcony “come on up girls” while one of two of us is considering the entertaining the question “are these she-men on leashes” as reality TV usually instills hints to these questions. But, what the hell. There had to be 20 plus people.

As they began to get closer, some of us who were NOT drinking began to contemplate back to high-school health class, “hmm, adams apple also known as the thyroid cartilage = the male gender” but the majority of us must have failed that class. From the pits of the stair well behold, in front us stood a 6 foot three, broad jawed, two hundred and fifty pound bench-pressing loaf of a man. Though in our defense, he was wearing a mini skirt over some leggings, a blond wig, and was accompanied by a man wielding a leash who also wore clothing which possessed ornaments known as “Bedazzled” and glitter.

If I had more time, I would explain to you how we used this awkward scenario to our benefit. Friends, who passed out first, became celebrities or victims to our cameras. We engaged in conversation which would reveal the craziest sexual things we have ever heard. I did not even know you can fit a lava lamp in some of the bodies cavities as expressed by the Him-Her. It was southern cultural anthropology at its finest. Unfortunately, some of them were chased off with chairs due to a un-diagnosed case of transphobia. But it was none the less, educational, AND KNOWLEDGE IS POWER!! …I guess.

Rapheumets Well's upcoming album "The Exile" is due out March 18th, 2016 through Test Your Metal Records. Check out a lyric video below for "Resurrecting The Blood God," and you can also hear new track "Witch Of Dark Spire" at this location.

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Ty Arthur splits his time between writing dark fiction, spreading the word about underground metal bands, and bringing you the latest gaming news. His sci-fi, grimdark fantasy, and horror novels can be found at Amazon.

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2 Comments on "Pit Stories: Invasion Of The Him-Hers"

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Anonymous Reader
1. Ferndog Ortega writes:

Holy sh**, ahaaha. I was there. I was the bassist of "Behind the Veil"
Good times indeed.

# Mar 9, 2016 @ 1:44 PM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address
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2. brandedcfh420 writes:

Ferndog? The Fern who was in Final Curse for a bit?

# Mar 10, 2016 @ 12:56 AM ET | IP Logged Reveal posts originating from the same IP address

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