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Dr. Greed is in the office

Posted in: Forum Home >> General Discussion >> Dr. Greed is in the office

Displaying posts 101 - 125 of 342 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 ... 13 14 Last
Displaying posts 101 - 125 of 342 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 ... 13 14 Last
Jul 19, 2011 9:20 AM ET #101 (permalink)

...And now my date Sunday went swimmingly (one second we're talking about serial killers, next thing I know we're making out in the "True Crime" section of a bookstore). She's everything I want, but here's the snag: she's narrowed it down to me and another dude...I hate having to compete.

Jul 19, 2011 11:47 AM ET #102 (permalink)

@ Incarnate: so it's a texture thing? This is going to be easier than I thought it would be. How do you feel about feces?

GC: Don't compete. Men are by default fucking retarded to women when we compete with eachother. Just be yourself and act as though you don't give a fuck. The confident man wins out every time.

Jul 19, 2011 5:22 PM ET #103 (permalink)

Feces? i don't much care to be around.. fecal matter.. when i don't have to, but i'm not unusually avoidant of it.

Jul 19, 2011 7:00 PM ET #104 (permalink)

@ Incarnate: It's not often that I turn down a chance to help someone out, but in this case I feel I have to perform due dilligence and impart upon you that I may not be the best fit for your desensitizing.

Jul 19, 2011 8:09 PM ET #105 (permalink)

Thanks as always Doc. And I shall follow suit. Its a bitch pretending not to feel bothered by it, but I'll repress the underlying insecurities.

EDIT: And to help Dr. Greeds point further with Incarnate. I was thinking, just put a ton of algae on your hands and just RAGE IT OUT. Punch shit with it on your hands. Convert your fear into hatred and use it as a weapon. Or you could just be a dick and toss algae at your friends and start an algae fight.

(This post was last edited on July 19, 2011 at 9:28 PM ET.)

Jul 19, 2011 9:25 PM ET #106 (permalink)

damn Dr. Greed...it went down way easier than I thought...According to her I'm her "clear favorite" and she's cutting off the other dates, except the main 'other guy.' Then she wants the second date with me, just to be sure...Then she's all mine. Thanks again, as always.

Just for the rest of you lurkers: Blindgreed actually has helpful advice. You may want to utilize his wisdom if you haven't yet...

Jul 20, 2011 10:49 AM ET #107 (permalink)

Glad I could help GC.

Incarnate: After careful thought i've decided to put aside your feelings on feces and help you with this algae problem. Algae poses no physical threat to you and in fact as darkstar pointed out has nutritional value as well as a pleasure to the senses involving taste and smell. The texture is freaking you out for some reason and we'll need to get to the bottom of this before you can move on to desensitization. 1). How old are you?

Jul 20, 2011 10:50 AM ET #108 (permalink)

BTW Peggy... You look absolutely stunning in that pic. ;-)

Jul 20, 2011 2:51 PM ET #109 (permalink)

Thanks, Dr. Greed. Even the Amy Winehouse mugshot was starting to disturb me after a while.

I have a question to ask you now: PowerPoint resumes - yes or no? Or should I print out Word resumes and smear feces on them?

Jul 20, 2011 3:21 PM ET #110 (permalink)

Personally I opt for the feces smeared resumes regardless of who or what they're for, but i'd have to say currently it would depend on the job you're applying for.

Jul 20, 2011 3:26 PM ET #111 (permalink)
ZMA's avatar

ZMA

LMAO! ^

Jul 21, 2011 8:39 AM ET #112 (permalink)

Dr. Greed FTW!

Jul 22, 2011 1:53 PM ET #113 (permalink)

I fear that i've lost my algephobe... *sighs* Curse my wretched affinity for feces!!! *heads for the cat box*

Jul 22, 2011 6:39 PM ET #114 (permalink)

I'm sure he'll be back Doc.

Jul 25, 2011 10:37 AM ET #115 (permalink)

I believe he is actually a she...

Jul 25, 2011 5:40 PM ET #116 (permalink)

That was Amy Winehouse? Whatever that avatar was, it was disturbing.

Dr. Greed: who not to go to for job advice.

Jul 25, 2011 6:41 PM ET #117 (permalink)

Speaking of Amy Winehouse...Though I was the first one to crack a joke about her death, I'm actually quite blown that she's now part of the 27 club. I did like her music.

Jul 26, 2011 11:00 AM ET #118 (permalink)

DB: I guess it would depend on the job. :D

Jul 26, 2011 8:42 PM ET #119 (permalink)

...If its the kind of job that can get done in an alley or the back/front seat of a car, I'd listen to the Dr.

Jul 26, 2011 9:26 PM ET #120 (permalink)

^in that light, I dont see why everyones freaking out about the economy...i get jobs all the time, they practically fall into my lap. I get so many jobs my head might explode.

0_0

Jul 27, 2011 5:22 PM ET #121 (permalink)

Leave it to FAN to have clever comments made of WIN.

Jul 27, 2011 7:27 PM ET #122 (permalink)

Well if I dont make witty comments then who will? Diamond Oz? Nah, cant let the brits win. They already feel superior to us since they invented monocles and tophats.

Jul 28, 2011 4:20 AM ET #123 (permalink)

I figure Amy Winehouse's death is just a sign of the times. Even the drug dealers are hitting a recession. Sorry...Too soon?

Jul 28, 2011 9:39 AM ET #124 (permalink)

Not for Amy Winehouse. Fuck her.

Jul 28, 2011 11:09 AM ET #125 (permalink)

NETRO!!! Dude, where have you been? You've been sorely missed here. How is everything?

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